Invisible Effort: The greatest talent of all! (for all the dreamers out there)

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It’s frustrating when you have “nothing to show” for what you do. People fail to see the effort you are putting in, because there is no immediate pay off for doing the work you are trying to do. Sometimes it seems like no one understand just how much you are doing to try to make your work a success.

It’s akin to being a stay-at-home parent. People assume you do nothing all day and that it’s easy when in reality you spend the entire day never having a break, constantly alert to the needs of someone else, trying to remember everything you need to get done, whilst having a helper or two who aren’t necessarily helpful, but at least in between major meltdowns, accidents, and spills they are trying.

It’s hard not to get overwhelmed and frustrated and snap. Or to become isolated because it really feels like no one gets it. No one sees the effort. They only see the outcome. And sometimes that takes a while. It can make you feel underappreciated and negative in general, BUT there is good news!

When all of this happens take a step back and remember, the people who take the chance to follow their dreams are few and far between. Most people won’t know. Most people won’t get it. Most people won’t see what you see. That just means you’re on the right track. So don’t lose heart. Don’t lost faith. Don’t give up.

Unacknowledged effort is often a key ingredient in achieving one’s dreams. So you’re invisible effort is really just your greatest talent of all!

About laurenc129

I'm a mom. Sometimes my hands turn orange. Other times I write. On twitter: @laurenc129

Posted on June 10, 2012, in babies and bugs, family, June 2012, writing and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 47 Comments.

  1. As someone trying to be self-employed, it is reassuring to know I am not the only one who feels this frustration…P.S. Thank you for the like πŸ™‚

  2. I’m happy to have found your blog. I totally agree. Writing is incredibly challenging and sometimes frustrating. Everyone out there thinks that it’s too difficult and worthless. But if you really believe in your talent, you can’t give up! Celeste

  3. let’s each keep dreaming and learning to live our dreams.

  4. I like that. And the payoff is immense. Just takes time.

  5. To take action without being attached to any results or rewards, that is good karma.

  6. This is for all the writers out there: From the composition of your comments, I can’t wait to read some of your stories! When you do get them, try looking into Smashwords, Amazon or some other self-publishing site and maybe we all can share these encouraging lives.
    As for the mothers— hang in there the end product may be many years from today, but the reward of a hard job done well is beyond price and the rest of us will truly thank you! I know it can be done because my child has “flown the nest” two years now(after graduating college with honors) and is in the military doing a fine job handling life. Makes a parent proud and relieved all the tough times were worth the cuts and bruises. Here’s a tip for all those who may feel unappreciated: you will be astounded how much your little one loves the small things you do for them and how much it goes with them when they leave home.

    • Thank you for that! What is smashwords? I’ve heard people talk about it, but my book is on amazon.

      It’s funny, but you are right. It is the small things that I missed when I left home. I didn’t realize how nice it was when someone would do those little things for me. But it was!

  7. Thanks for the look at my post on “Better Sleep Naturally”. I liked yours too and completely agree. You are a totally unique individual, as we all are. Stay on the path that’s right for you, even if no one else notices. And consider yourself acknowledged. ☺

  8. This is exactly what it’s like for my mom. Sometime in the last year or so, it occured to me just how much she gets done in a day. She’d like this family’s very own superhero! It’s humbling to think about everything she does, even though she doesn’t have a “9-5” job. It also occured to me when I was little, and she did have a job. There was so much that I needed her there for and she just couldn’t be there. Between rides to where I needed to be and getting to where she needed to be and getting dinner on the table and all the things a stay-home mom does, it’s dizzying! It made me appreciate her a lot more. She puts a lot of effort into the upkeep of this family, but it takes perspective to see the effort and not just the outcome.

    • You are right! It does take perspective. You sound like an amazing daughter! πŸ™‚ It took me a long time to realize just how much it takes for someone to run a household and have people dependent upon them for everything. It really is pretty impressive what parents do. And it’s definitely the hardest job I’ve ever had!

  9. Great post! It makes my heart sing to see the shifts that others are making. You sweet thing are doing so awesomely and you got to the heart of the matter and are being you! Wonderful!

  10. I really liked this post because it feels good to know someone else knows how frustrating it is being a writer. I’ve been dreaming of writing novels since my early teens and have completely failed to do so because of my fears of how people will like it or not. In fact that is why I started blogging about two weeks ago. I’ve given up on my dream because I am tired of the emotional pain of fighting the never ending arguments going through my head of wither or not I should write my novels. But like I said your post is encouraging. I still doubt I will write my novels but I am not so down on myself or my potential readers as I was. I will defiantly being following your blog from now on.

    • I always encourage people to write. Start smaller than a novel if you want. Don’t write it for anyone. Don’t even write it as though you plan for anyone else to read it. Just write. If you want to write, then write. You said yourself that you are a writer. And that’s what writer’s do. Don’t worry about the rest. It’s hard. But it’s amazing, too. So don’t give up. At least leave the possibility open. Might as well take a chance. It’s easy not to try. Then you already know the outcome. It’s that uncertainty and frustration that accompanies actually trying that is difficult. But it’s also the only rewarding option. So stay open. Give yourself a chance πŸ™‚

  11. I am currently in this rut ….I fear someday my best wont be good enough , It scares me terribly …I do push forward with very little to show for my accomplishments …

    • I completely understand! I’m there too a lot of the time. I actually wrote this last friday, but didn’t have a computer to post it until today. And I feel like I’ve been in the rut since. But something about writing it helped, too. Keep pushing forward! You are doing great things, and making great strides, even if they are invisible right now. One day they will appear. And you’ll have something to look back at that’s suddenly clear to everyone. πŸ™‚

  12. Vicki Tremper

    Yup, I so relate to this. I just keep writing and working hard. Someday it WILL pay off. Thanks for stopping by and introducing yourself!

  13. I think we all go through the day asking ourselves ‘what’s next?’ Anything can and invariably will come in our way and hold us up. We have to be strong. We have to have courage and just push other things from our thoughts and do what we were meant to do, WRITE!

    Thanks for visiting my blog and I hope everything you are looking for comes your way.

  14. lifeofministermom

    Thank you for liking my post ” A Change in the Game.” As a brand new SAHM I’m gearing up for the good, the bad and the interesting. :0) I’m reminded that you have to be selective about who you share your visions and dreams with, because even the well-intentioned don’t always understand. I appreciate your support!

    • That is very true! It’s hard for even those who care most about you to understand a lot of the time, despite being well intentioned. It took me a while to learn that. Thank you for mentioning that! It’s important to remember! πŸ™‚

  15. Thank you so much! We are not alone! Keeping the faith:)

  16. Thanks for the reminder to keep the faith…..;-)

  17. This makes me think of my job as a corporate trainer. The vast majority of the time, it’s a thankless task and we’re often the first to get blamed – “training never showed us this” or “training said that’s wrong.” It happens to every trainer. I even make a joke of it in class; without trying to cross any HR defined religious boundaries, I’ll say “one of you will betray me… and say ‘they didn’t show us this in training…'” They laugh… but it happens almost every time.

    But occasionally you’ll get a thank you… even an email from someone to say how much they enjoyed the training and how much they learnt – and were even inspired – by their time with me. That’s when it’s worth it. Last year, I told my “astronaut story” to a room full of other trainers – the one where one of the Apollo astronauts said “it won’t fail because of me” – and I’ve told the same story to participants in classes. Nothing gives me a bigger kick than when someone says “I used your quote the other day. I still think of that.”

    You can only change the world one person at a time… and I soooo want to change the world.

  18. I’m not a mum, but I just wanted to take a minute to share my appreciation for all stay-at-home parents. In my experience (with a mum who was a stay-at-home-mum) and understanding, it really IS a full-time job. I don’t think “nothing to show” is accurate at all… well, not through my eyes. It’s so sad that some people have that attitude about parenting and that they undervalue the work of full-time parenting. It is the most important job of all!

  19. That’s right do not give up there are blessings along the way for a stay at home Mom. A lot of hard work and much gets unnoticed but do not dismay it does have silver linings.

  20. “it really feels like no one gets it. No one sees the effort” …….And one day your adult child will look at you and say ‘thanks for everything you did for me’ ….and it will make it all worthwhile …

    • That’s true! I think the nice thing about working with kids is that they are fairly reciprocal in that they say nice things and do nice things that remind us we are doing a good job. I think it’s harder with things that aren’t kids, like writing, or whatever our passion or dream is, because there’s nothing talking back, just our own efforts.

  21. Just what I needed to hear. Thank you!

  22. I feel like this message was meant for my family and I today! Thank you, because I totally understand as a stay at home mom as well. People always ask, “Are you ever gonna work again” and I have to try really hard not to come back with a smart comment back. It’s like nobody really values mother’s raising their own children anymore…

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